Parents say the darndest things

I love when parents decide to get up on a high horse without ever making an effort to become actively involved in their child's education.

Missing open-houses, back-to-school nights, conferences, never returning phone calls or replying to notes that you send home...then having the audacity to get upset with us the teacher. Surely, the kids of these parents are also likely to be master communicators.

Scene-Conference with irate parents today:

Me: "When Little Johnny gets home from school, what does he tell you about his day?"

Dad: (shifts eyes nervously to look in direction of wife) "Uhm, well, uhm...after school...Little Johnny is really busy with...uhm...well..activities."

IF YOU AREN'T GOING TO TALK TO ME AT LEAST TALK TO YOUR CHILD! GODDAMN! I KNOW THIS AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE ONE!

Parents be crazy.

How to 'ack' cool...

according to 'E' my 2nd grader.

First you need: a par (pair) of blak sun glasis then a blak gean jakit.

Then you mint wont to spike your her. Then you leen on a tree. Then if a small ball role by you'e foot then pik it up and throwe it.

When I asked E where he learned how to be so cool he said, "I watch Simpsons." Obviously.

I wish you could see the matching illustrations. And yes, we are working on the spelling and adding details :)

"I am not a crook"

So student council elections are coming up and campaigning is going strong.

One of the kids in my class suggested to our nominee that he run on the platform of "NO MORE DRESS CODE! FREE PIZZA EVERY FRIDAY! NO MORE HOMEWORK!!" You know the usual...

Thankfully, my wise and responsible nominee said that he can't make promises that he can't keep. "That would be dishonest".

To which his classmate replied, "Why not? That's what real politicians do..."

Maybe these kids are smarter than I've given them credit for.